I am an opinionated gal. This is no secret.
The other day I realized that save for my recent “What Steff Says About Health” and my Top Ten Tuesday posts, I don’t really do much opinion-heavy writing here. All of my opinionated-ness just builds up inside me like gasoline inside a balloon and explodes in a fireball of self-righteous preachiness to whatever friend, stranger, or acquaintance happens to light the match.
It is for the good of humanity that I am going to start getting my opinionated rants out into the universe in a more controlled manner. For all of you Glee fans out there, think of this as my “Sue’s Corner”. Not a Glee fan? Watch this video to get a glimpse of what I’m talking about it. It’s pretty phenomenal.
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The first topic I’d like to rant about in this new series is….
The Dreaded D Word…
Few words words send a shiver up my spine the way the D-word does. “Cockroach” and “smegma” elicit similar feelings of disgust but that’s really about it.
What has me all riled up is NOT the literal meaning of the word diet (“the kinds of food that a person, animal or community habitually eats”), rather it’s the more colloquial, second definition that sets my blood boiling:
diet (2) – a special course of food to which one restricts oneself, either to lose weight or for medical reasons
(via Oxford English Dictionary)
At the moment I am not going to address dieting for medical reasons. What I am talking about, however, is when generally healthy people feel the need to “go on a diet” to lose those last 10 pounds, look hot in a bikini, be more attractive to their preferred gender(s), or whatever other reason leads them over to the dark side.
So here is…
Why I Hate the D-Word!
1. Diets are Temporary – they are things people “go on” until they reach some desired end-point and the “go off”. This is a ginormous slap in the face to the idea that healthiness as a lifestyle. By going on and off diets in response to the numbers on the scale, the benefits of living a healthy life each and every day do not get reinforced and truly healthy habits cannot be formed!
2. Diets are Restricting – it’s right there in the definition! I don’t care whether it’s a low-carb diet, the cookie diet, the blood-type diet, the cabbage soup diet..whatever…all diets I have ever seen involve lists of “good foods” and “bad foods”. This kind of thinking can be toxic to anyone with any sort of history of restricting/binging behavior. By making certain foods “off limits” it sets up a vicious cycle.
With diets, the feelings of guilt and shame that can be brought on by the notion of “failing” are really significant…especially to those with less-than-stellar self-esteem. A healthy lifestyle that embraces the idea of everything in moderation helps to alleviate these notions of “good” and “bad” and the guilt that comes along with them.
3. Diets put the focus in the wrong place! – With the vast majority of diets, the focus is on weight loss, or more specifically weight loss at an impossibly quick pace. Yes, you can lose weight pretty quickly on an extreme diet…but most “dieters” gain back the weight they lost (and MORE) once they go “off” the diet. This becomes it’s own vicious cycle of yo-yo dieting. More detrimental than just the extra weight gained back, yo-yo dieting can have serious negative consequences on an individual’s physical and mental health! Plus, healthiness and skinniness ARE NOT the same thing. Just because someone is losing weight, it does not mean that they are necessarily becoming healthier. And what should the real goal be, people? Healthy…or skinny. (You know my vote.)
4. Diets don’t address the underlying issue of low self-esteem! – In a culture that places so much value on how we look, it’s easy to fall into the habit of comparison and negative self-talk…which almost always lead to feelings of low self-esteem or worthlessness. For most of us, Jenifer Aniston’s legs and Kim Kardashian’s curves are simply not a reality, and that is OK. Thinking that going on a diet and losing those last 10 pounds is going to solve our problems and make us love ourselves is foolish. Wanting to lose weight is not, in and of itself, a bad thing. But all losing weight does is make you smaller. It does not make you happier.
Learning to love yourself at any size may be a lot harder than jumping into the latest fad diet craze…but the results last a lot longer. (I’m personally still stuggling with this issue, but making constant strides with the help of some awesome body-loving blogs like Medicinal Marzipan and Healthy Girl…go check them out!)
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So there you have it…my “why I hate the D-word” rant. Clearly, all of the statements above are solely my opinion so feel free to agree or disagree. I’d love to hear your thoughts on the topic!
But I hope that some of you are with me on this. Lets raise up our fists and shout “DOWN WITH DIETS!“
I love this post! I have never reached clinical levels of eating disorder behavior, but I definitely have disordered eating in my past. Thankfully, I have overcome the “slippery slope” and am more even-keel. Sure, I still struggle if my clothes feel a little tighter…I mean, who wants to be forced into their sweatpants – like Tim Allen in “The Santa Clause”? However, I have now shifted my focus and my choices based on health and how foods make my body feel. Anytime I hear about the “good/bad” lists and counting calories, I feel like my eyes will roll out of my head. Having true health is not synonymous with being skinny or really fit!! It’s so much more than that. Thank you for posting!
The concept of dieting is perverse. We are unhappy with our appearance and we engage in negative self-talk until we feel compelled to further punish ourselves. So we go “on” a diet, knowing that at some point in the future, we will go “off” the diet and return to the foods we enjoy. Essentially, we are choosing punishment over pleasure. Eating is pleasurable. Some of us enjoy it so much we may need to learn how to eat. But resricting foods we enjoy inevitably leads us to crave them even more.
Personally, once I truly accepted the fact that I was someone who really struggles with their weight and likely will for the rest of my life I lost all desire to diet. Treating yourself with loving kindness doesn’t really allow for a “diet.” I learned, primarily through my yoga practice, which foods my body cannot tolerate and I choose not to eat them (food intolerances & allergies). But restricting myself from any food I desire at any particular moment? Not going to happen. Food also loses its appeal when it is not forbidden.
And not dieting? It has allowed me to let go of over 110lbs and counting.
Great post Steff – thanks for sharing!
steff this is awesome
i couldn’t agree with you more!
and ps. i LOVE the idea of sticking your opinions into your blog. i’d love to see more of that!
Uhoh, I hope my latest post didn’t prompt this entry!
I think it’s a difficult concept to grapple because eating healthy does mean, to a certain extent, restricting your intake to foods you decide are healthy and foods you decide aren’t. What is and isn’t healthy is so up in the air, and there’s constantly new research contradicting old research, etc.
I agree with the idea of fad or restrictive diets being unhealthy, but I think that’s in extremes. For instance, I try not to eat a lot of processed sugar. That’s restrictive, but it’s restrictively healthy.
I would never go on a “diet” that didn’t let me eat lean protein and lots of veggies (two food groups that are, generally, ALWAYS healthy). And while eating healthy and losing weight can sometimes can go hand in hand, I understand that they don’t always. But where do you draw the line? Why is a goal say, of running a certain distance, different than a goal of losing the 10lbs you need to run that distance, if you meet the goal either way by diet and exercise? In the end, either goal would have the same effect. Philosophically, there are a lot of concepts I grapple with that I don’t think have easy answers.
One thing I agree STRONGLY with is that a diet (or even just living healthy) doesn’t fix self esteem. I consider myself to be healthy weight, in good shape, active, but sometimes I still feel fat, feel disgusted with myself, feel like I haven’t really done any good for myself at all. And I realize that’s not something that any amount of weight loss or exercise will fix. It’s not like, magically when I lose the last 5lbs I want to lose or climb my first 10, I’ll start loving my body. That’s just purely mental, but still in my “healthy” goals for myself.
Since i’ve always struggled with my relationship with food, I wonder if i’ll ever not struggle. For the past few years, I feel like I’ve gotten most of my eating under control– I rarely binge and never purge– but I still wonder what I’ll do and how I’ll eat when I actually don’t want to lose anymore weight– a day that seems fast approaching. How can I keep up my healthy lifestyle without going overboard? I know how to gain, how to lose, but how do I maintain?
Sorry for such a long comment! This is just something I think about a lot.
don’t apologize, nessie! i love long, thoughtful comments! and yes, my post was partially inspired by your post as well as by several conversations i’ve had recently with people who are trying to lose weight.
the way your phrased what you wrote sums it all up. statements like “i try not to eat a lot of processed sugar” are healthy-sounding statements. if you had said “processed sugar is the devil so i never go near it” i would have some doubts. your mindset sounds like it allows for freedom. like if you really want a bowl of ice cream (and the processed sugar it contains), can you make the decision to eat it, enjoy it mindfully, and not get down on yourself. and knowing you, i know that you can do that. you can still enjoy a bowl of ice cream from time to time while recognizing that eating it every day would not be in keeping with your goal of living healthy. i don’t see that as a restriction, i see that as making wise choices and honoring your health.
i have nothing against weight loss goals in principle. i know i have a “happy weight” where i feel my best and i recognize that i am about 6 or 7 lbs heavier than that at the moment. i’m not going to “diet” to get there though. i’m not going to cut out foods i enjoy or make up rules for myself to follow. rather, i know that by examining myself, my habits, portion sizes, frequencies of certain foods etc, and being more mindful in my eating…those pounds may come off. and if they don’t? i’ll reassess my habits and tweak them as necessary. and if they still don’t come off, and i feel like i am honoring my body with my food and exercise choices…well then i’m going to respect that my body knows more than me and not force it to go to a place that it isn’t ready to go.
i think you’ll figure out how to maintain because your body will tell you. if it is happy, you will reach an equilibrium. and as long as you keep listening to it, it will tell you what to do.
love you!!
So glad I finally got to read this. I wrote a similar but not as well executed post a bit back.
With my ED past I knew I couldn’t “go on a diet” to to lose weight. I had to do it in the sense of the first definition.
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